Bonnie & Clyde

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I don’t understand why it’s so intense

I don’t remember when it attached to me

Accompanying me sometimes daily

Today it’s different

Today it’s like never before

As it to over stay it’s welcome

But really I have welcomed it

I am holding onto it

I have become it

For some reason I’m demanding it

Using it as bait, revenge, hate

It’s my favorite little passenger

it’s like we’re joy riding but how can the two co-exist

How can they look so similar

How can they both feel rewarding

we’re the only two in the car

riding so fast I can barely see the scenery

just vague colors rapidly past my eyes

Anger’s my Clyde, and I’m it’s Bonnie

 

via Daily Prompt: Passenger

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P.A.I.N.T

PAINT….is what I do when I take a picture.  I paint a picture of a smile on my face artificially superficial, as that smile is not originated in my heart. I always envy those whose smiles are not forced….not generated. You can look at them and tell they’re just happy people . Joyful. Content. I want that to be me. But for me the smile is forced. I often look at the painting and try to distinguish if it “looks” genuine enough to pass off as real. Sometimes maybe and idk if others notice but I can definitely tell its not authentic. Behind that painting is hurt and disappointment. The mask others see destroys all visible traces of vulnerability. Eventually though that paint smears and the drippings are reflected in fits of anger and rage….clumbsy words aimed at other people’s character. The painting is overshadowed by tears and feelings of entrapment.  I want to work towards authenticating that smile.  I want that smile to generate from the inside out radiating so radiantally that’s its authenticity cannot be questioned.  I want my smile to be sought after by others. I want my heart to be something I can give away; free of dust and debris. I want my smile to say: I’m free, I’m loved. 

Paint